Something not so light that I wrote at my other writing home earlier.
As Malice Of The Clipse aka Gene Thornton prepares to release his book, “Wretched, Pitiful, Poor, Blind and Naked” to the world, I feel it’s an oportune time to share with you my Clipse story and why Malice’s video blogs and forthcoming book are so important to me. It’s part journal, part exposé, and part persuasive essay as to why you should support his latest endeavors. Other than being a fan and the ecnounters you’re about to read, I’m not affiliated with Malice or the Clipse in anyway. Just sharing my story and my thoughts as always.
Many moons ago (2006 – 2007 ish) I was a 19 year old guy fresh off of “dropping out of school to rap”, or so THEY said; I think THEY know now that my plans were far beyond that. I was young, to an extent angry, frustrated with the conditions my family was living in, unhappy with who I was inside and ready to do whatever 4 what I thought would make me happy, money and fame. That down 4 whatever attitude took me places I didn’t belong, doing things I had no business doing. Enter the Clipse.
I’ve never been a fool and I know that 91% of what most rappers deliver is simply fabricated jargon that they hope the masses will buy into. Some guys know in their hearts that some of it is destructive and misleading but continue because they have to feed their family and I can never knock that hustle, it’s just not for me. What was for me was the truth. The Jay-Z’s and the Clipse’s of the world. There’s a certain feeling you get when you’re dealing with authenticity that just can’t be replicated when dealing with less than authentic. People whose stories you really identify with, even if your story isn’t exactly the same.
Jigga man was a bit before my time and a bit over my head in the sense that when he was at the height of talking his fly stuff, I was about ten years old and at that point unexposed to just how real it was. But now it’s 9 years later, I’ve been exposed, and I want in — not for cool sake but like I said, I wanted to change living situations and change them quick. I hadn’t developed the foresight and guiding light that I possess these days. Blissful ignorance had kicked in and taken complete control over me.
So life is pretty good at this point. I’m in my Chevy doing the damn thing; enough to be able to change living conditions without being on anyone’s radar and I got the perfect soundtrack to keep me going, the Clipse’s music. In my mind, they were me and I was them. Dudes that could easily rap circles around anyone with a microphone but would rather find other means of surviving than to be bothered with the circus the music business was becoming. So with my Gucci sneakers, gold bracelet, and Polo everything, I was determined to follow in their footsteps. Luckily for me, things came crashing down quicker than I ever could have imagined. That, coupled with some reading, some soul searching, and an Obama speech that I attended, I no longer wanted to be like the Clipse; I wanted to be me.
Still I remained a huge fan. HUGE FAN. I ran into Pusha T a few times and began to tell him how I had this big vision for the Clipse and to get them the recognition they deserved. Keep in mind that at this point I had a job within the recording industry and I wanted the Clipse to be my main project. I fought for it like I do everything else that I obsess over. Pusha gave me some time of day but he probably knew that a guy named Kanye would show up years later and get him his proper shine. Their road manager, Steven Victor, was more interested in telling me about his latest BMW acquisition than anything I had to say about working with them. Kyambo “Hip-Hop” Joshua was extremely courteous but he’s freaking Hip-Hop; when you’re priorities are Roc-A-Fella, Lil Wayne, Drake, and Young Jeezy, some 20 year old kid named Phella with his Clipse dream goes to the bottom of the pile, naturally.
Success didn’t come until I tracked down the Clipse’s other manager, Geezy. This was the man to talk to. Unlike everyone else, he made an actual attempt to hear me out, even calling me one day while I was driving and listening to the Clipse. I turned it up and said to him “See, I’m not fronting. I’m a real fan”. He chuckled and then we continued conversation. Discussed everything from their then new clothing line Play Cloths to what kind of records were best for them at that point. I was my typical self when motivated; talking way above my head and selling Geezy a dream he couldn’t refuse. We hung up with plans to continue another day, but that day never came.
I woke up one beautiful spring morning to read on AllHipHop.com that Geezy, real name Anthony Gonzalez, was facing an 82-count Federal indictment. My heart sunk. Not because my Clipse connection was going away and with him, probably my only chance of ever working with them, but because a man who I had spoken to over the past month, who showed me the utmost respect, who is a father, was being put away. Whether he did what he was accused of wasn’t for me to judge or even care about. It was just a sad day and I felt for him, the brothers, and everyone else affected.
That same morning, I resigned from the music industry company I was working with and decided to start Da Fam Inc back up. Starting my company meant getting back to music and getting back to business. Around the same time, Malice of the Clipse was releasing these very spiritual video blogs directed by some people called Illusive Media. The messages in the videos really resonated with the transformation I was going through and the way the vids were shot were so impressive that I got on the phone to Illusive and said I had to work with them. A few trips to VA later, a price quote that was way above what I could afford, and a sold Chevy later, I paid Illusive and we got our video.
The video was great, but even greater was the experience of working with those guys. They pretty much have done everything media related for the Clipse and had great stories for days about the group, about Geezy, about Pharrell, about everything. To prove how small the world is, I would later run into Malice’s son (an artist in his own right), Fame, at a studio session. He looked, sounded, and behaved just like his pops and was another good person to meet. I was impressed that a celebs kid could be that humble; even helping me with a few of my songs hooks.
I say all this to say that when the book drops on February 14th, it’s one that anyone who enjoys reading what I write should probably check out. I have no clue what’s in it but judging from all the videos leading up to it, I can only assume it’s similar to the thoughts I try to share daily. About not chasing cool or riches. About finding ones self. About being true. About hitting rock bottom before you can know what the real mountain top is. About belief and faith. About repentance and forgiveness. That’s just if I had to take a wild guess though. We’ll find out soon enough.
-Phella
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Unreal. I don’t forget anything but even if I did, I wouldn’t forget this day.
