My homie is on a roll these days. He speaks, people listen, most criticize, I sit back and smile because I feel 100% the same. I’ve idolized a lot of people in my day but no one quite captures my emotions the way Mr.West does. Read up.
If you watch you will notice the lead singer of Mista is who we now know as Bobby Valentino. I think if he stayed in this Anthony Hamilton-esque lane he would have more longevity in his career. Songs like this are timeless. “Beep, Beep, Beep”? not quite.
Sometimes it seems going right is wrong, going left is wrong, going straight is wrong, and we all know for sure that turning back is wrong. However, stopping isn’t an option either. Slow down maybe, but never stop. So I’m about to just pick a direction and live with wherever it takes me.
Sidebar: Sorry for being so vague. Can’t really go into much detail with stuff in this new version of I Am Phella.
December 2006. Due to several factors I decided after three semesters of college that it was time to move on. Had a great time but I wasn’t learning anything I couldn’t learn on my own. I was bored, felt school was a waste of time and money, and I had a few more important things to attend to.
Fast forward to January 2010. At 22 I’m a bit more understanding and patient. I’ve never been much on compromise but I’m trying to learn. Although I can’t see how a college degree could possibly benefit me, I’ve had several elder relatives tell me that it’s their dying wish that I obtain a college degree.
To be honest, I’m not feeling the idea at all but I figure what’s 4 hours a week to sacrifice and possibly make a few folks proud and happy?
On the other hand what is it to make a few folks proud and happy if I’m conforming to something I absolutely don’t believe in?
This, my friends, is my struggle. I figure if I document my experience this time around it might be easier and dare I say, fun. If the journal abruptly stops, you’ll know what happened……..
Class Journal Day 1 (January 13, 2010)
First person here. First one to sign the attendance. I used my Da Fam Inc pen to sign it. Wonder if anyone else is going to walk in here and use such indelible ink, I doubt it. Just me and the teacher here as he eats his Subway sandwich. I can’t access the internet so I’m typing this to avoid sitting here in awkward silence while we await the next victim. I haven’t been in a classroom in a long time. The competitor in me wants to stay and see how good I can do. The other half of me is ready to walk out of this place and go do what I’m really supposed to be doing in this world. However, maybe this can assist what I’m supposed to be doing? It’s impossible to make music and run a company when everyday you’re getting phone calls and strange looks about why you aren’t in school. Now maybe I can buy time as we develop Da Fam Inc into the monster corporation it will be. And maybe, just maybe, this piece of paper (degree) that everyone says is so useful will be able to help me…..how? I don’t know.
Class Journal Day 2 (January 20, 2010)
Today I was a few minutes late to class. Had to stop by home to shower real quick and sometimes that hot water is difficult to step out of. I hate being late. If you study history you’ll see that most great people were always on time. When you’re late you usually have to say “sorry I was in traffic” or “sorry I had to attend to family issues”; great people hate apologizing so they avoid situations that will force them to do so.
15 minutes in and I’m enjoying todays talk a bit more. We’re discussing goals. The professor just said “if you don’t know where you’re going, how will you know when you get there?”….I like that. Now we’re watching a video and the guy is talking about SMART GOALS.
Specific (There should be some detail as to what you want to accomplish)
Measurable (Goals that are measurable indicate how much progress has been made.)
Attainable (Set goals that challenge, because challenging goals are motivating. The goals should not, however, exceed the resources available to the goal-setter.)
Realistic (Basically the same as attainable.)
Time. Based (Every goal needs a deadline for completion.)
See, where this school stuff loses me is with this attainable and realistic stuff. I’ve noticed school in general preaches “realistic goal setting”, “knowing what you can’t do”. I hate that kind of talk. Who’s to say what a person CAN’T do? That word isn’t allowed around me. All my goals far exceed my resources, so should I quit? Did Oprah’s resources match where she is today?
Now some guy behind me is confessing to “kidding” himself. 40 minutes into class and he’s already buying into this nonsense that his goals can’t be achieved. Now he’s about to join the billions of people who will settle for mediocrity because they were led to believe they’re “kidding” themselves. “No vision, lack of ambition, so wack!” - Jay-Z
I can get with this new topic. Talking about overcoming procrastination. The solution, according to everyone here, is to just do it. Don’t think, just do it. If you know me, you know I always have to question everything. So I asked, “can’t procrastination be a good thing sometimes? sometimes we just do so much that we miss vital signs. maybe what we call procrastination can also be a good way of gaining a better perspective before acting.” We’ve concluded that I’m right as well as the people who say just do it. I can live with that.
Second class is in the books. Can’t say I’ve learned anything new these first two weeks but it feels good to be amongst such a diverse group throwing ideas and philosophies around. I’ll live to see another day. Until next week, peace.
Hello and Happy MLK Jr. day.
I know most of your inboxes have been inundated with every kind of Exhibit you can think of and I think it’s a testament to just how ridiculous the original was…Just Blaze and Jay outdid themselves. The first time I heard this track the words came to me and I had to record it. To not do it because so many others have done it is to not eat McDonalds because they’ve served over a billion……….
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Video: In Studio
Phella In Training Camp…Working On Exhibit P from Da Fam Cam on Vimeo.
John Mayer is probably the best contemporary artist when it comes to capturing the dark aspects of relationships. This song is one of many examples.
Happy……..New Year
